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CAUSE IM NOTHING TO YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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I hate it,

I know I should not feel this way

And that loving a person or a friend sould always be unconditionally.

But why? WHY me?

Why do I care so much for you knowing I won't get your concern and that I would get nothing out of it.

I do not want to think so much

So I kept it all in me.

Or say, I dint want you to know I cared

cause I know you wouldn't bother much

so I kept it all in me...

I don't know what or I should to make myself better

So I had to prtnd but I can't anymore

All she does was just one thing and you are all just for her

I did tried more and be better but your heart only got her.

But guess you did not think of me.

I have talked hell lots and you did not bother.

I was by your side whether

You were right or not.

Though I did not wanted to when you did something wrong.

I'd wish you would not forget me.

I also wnat to be the special one too.=(

Today is the last dayye for school this year, Miss Kong is going away, I hate ppl going away everytime and why is it always like that and everything is so irritating when I really hate seeing ppl leaving it hurts so bad, no one would understand that kind of feeling I had. It just hurt so bad.





M.E im gonna miss you and today gonnaa be the last dayye in school seeing you around. I'll miss you. =(

Today went for prudence communnion, then went to eat pepper lunch then wenook t to bugis then to town took noe-prints. Im really going bankrupt and seriously I am and spnding almost over tn dollars on junks... OKAYEE Ba not really junks but Im really going bankrupt. Then ate KFC at taka. Then head to clarke quay and wlked around. then headed back hom. heheh. So called a fun day but very tiring, my legs are aching due to my heels and my uni are not washed yet. And im so not ready for school tmr. And hopefully tmr won't be boring or tiring day or rathr bad. But I aint looking forward to school tmr but checking maths paper so got to go school. Sigh, Im very tired now. Going to turn in bed soon after bathing and sweet dreams sweet. TATA=D

Checked papers today, I drop a lot and so did my clique except, Debra, well, im happy for her did not thought she would get highr some of us in the clique including me!!! hahah. no larr, I can see her effort were paid off seeing her study hard and paying attention during class seriously, seems to be all working.hahahah,


Went over to garett's house, watch horror movie, and we wented real horror ones and so we decided to rent them so chose one and they counter said they supposed to check or talk to M18 or above peeps so I called up someone...... hahah. Loves talkingto him over the phone he sounds damn funny over the phone and that was my first time calling him. hahahah. ANYWAY, garett's grandma ooked food for us, and yupp, her grandma is soooo cute and I actually wanted to hug her but Wrong larrr, so did not do so.


Going out tmr, alot of places to go and got a lot appointment, but canceling one of them to be friends. Am excited for tmr and sunday too, but hope DEBRA would turn up and not be so lazy yeah. heh.

OHHHH! and today M.E dressed until damn glam and gae everyone a surprise. hahah. I thought she'd lookd gorgeouse my friendsthought so too., never tought I would see her in those oufit but not in skirt yet. hahah. Don't wish to see. hahah. HEY! she super duper cold towards me and when I told her about it, she said on the contrary Im the one being cold and avoiding her but I avoid her cause she avoid me! Sigh. And sometimes she purposely make me hate her and pretend sh don't care and I hate it. Rarr.


ANYWAY, hope tmr will be lots of fun yo! Am looking forward to tmr. and many more good days. (= Goodnight.

I MISS MUMMY!!!! I WANT MUMMY!!! MUMMY!MUMMY!MUMMY!MUMMY!!!! Sigh, I miss her. My aunt at home started talking about her AND OF ALL THINGSSHE HAD TO TALK ABT MY MUM WHEN I HAD HARD TIME CONTOLLING MY DAMN EMOTIONS INSIDE!!! and today is the "day" she went away far from me. in months, 17th. Sigh I can't believe she went away from my life just like that. But I know she'll always be in my heart. All I want to do now is give mummy a tight hug. PLEASE GOD, I want to give her a last hug. PLEASE. IF CAN, COULD I TURN BACK THE CLOCK?!!! PLEASEEEEE.


Anyway, I do not feel like going for OBS anymore cause got f*****g peeps going... that think they so god damn big deal just because they got everything or whatever it is I hate their attitude but im trying to put those bad picctures behind yo! Like they tried bad-mouthing my friends oh, whatever.Just because they are in the better class. ARRGH. Im so damn pissed off now with everything.
>=( Well I don't wanna care abt those ppls. I want to be more optismistic. And I even thought I could make more friends there and achieve myself but can't find anyone to replace me to go instead and I guess everythings too little too late now to change anything. Well, but I do hope I will bring back good memories from there and maybe its worth going then. Well have to give OBS money on friday. sigh I really wish I could use the money for shopping instead but I know its impossible.hmmm, Just hope the money I paid for is worthy.


I miss M.E. She is always on course and I always had to miss her and its always me missing ppl why can't they be the one? hahahahah joking! ERRR. i guess its time for me to forget her now and forever and thats what she wants too. One more week and its holidays!!!! Yaay! Don't have to wear school uni and wake up early and can have more late hight out. hahahah.

I want to spend moretime with friends and have shallet with my pri friends but it impossible but I thinking of planning a BBQ party with them and since AH LI asked me to plan it. hahah. Seriously, my planning sucks well giving it a try. Hopefully everyon omes and not with their GF oR BF. heh. during holidays....

I wanna go clubbing again but Heard rumours, don't know should I go??? hmmm, its the only time I an relieve all my sorrows by drinking and crying everthing out and dance like a mad person. hahahah. and meet new ppl. Nice ones. Everyone is but some. slanted lorr. hahah. Well im the type who loves having fun and be happy all the time and love lingering around. I love that kind of feeling who don't. hahahah.

I wanna go M.O.S!!!! And i still pray pray pray hard that my exam results will be goody good good. =) I'll pray forr everyone too. hahah, as in not really pray but erm yeah ask my aunt pray lor. hahah. So sweet of me ain;t I. HAHAH.
Ending off here, byeeee.

YTD got tired cause got home late so did not blog.

Went over to manyan's house ytd and she messed up my hair and wash it for me cause she was styling my hair. It was lots of fun ytd. Then went to town with garett to change bus back home. I got a appt at eight thirty with him so hd to rush home.

Met him, I felt weird meting him again though but I did try to tell him that I don't wish to see him again cause I thought it was wrong to continue to be together when we got no trust within. Then I told him that next time when we sees each other, we didn't know one another. Then there was this long silence between us and I madethe first move to tell him that im sorry. And that I want to head back home. Then he sent me home. He did not said anything and so made the first move again and he folowed me back then told him to go back cause its late then he asked me if he could hug me one last time. So I told him just one last friendly and everything will be over..... so since then we went sperate ways. Hey I seriously him and the way he smells. anyway, I don't think he is my type nor am I. I guess this might be a better way out. I love you.



Well hope exams willbe over soon cause its so god damn irritating. I want to get good results but I cant seem to concentrate on them. Rarrrr! I doncare larr, Im just gonna study and think of nothing yo. when it over, going out with bestie and clique. Wannna go clubbing with friends too. And more shopping!!! hahaha. Got to save more cash for use. Or mayb get a job to make time fly but all that are yet to come.hahahah. Pray pray pray hard for better results!!! And I think my blog timing got a damn prob. hmmm, anyway, having tuition soon.... got to go.(=
CHEERS to everyone. (=

headed to library and study but I do not kow why but I just can't seem to concentrate on my studies. Then wnt back home early for tuition. And seriously my tuition teacher is god damn sweet. heh. He makes m laugh and sometimes he seemed to know me better than anyone. Well its like having a good tuition teacher and a sort friend at the same time. haha. maybe my aunt tuition fees will be more worthwhile.



Anyway something embarrassing happened, I wanted to msg someone and instead sent it to someone else and got all messed up. =( Thats why I was wondering why he did not reply or is it because i said somthing wrong so went to chk my sent items and yes I did sent to the wrong person and the person was M.E then explained to her but I guess she wont bother anyway. hahah.
I cant oncentrate on my studies leh.... how??? I think I won't be able to do well for my exam tmr but its the final one for this year I meant!!! Well hope everything will go well tmr then. (=

So long never blog. I don't feel like blogging anyway. Nothing special happen on this day. I miss someone that badly. Exams coming, cannot concentrate but I really want to pass the exam with good marks. Bought doughnuts from clarke quay. I spend over $70 on them. But I guessed it was worth it cause they are cute. I gave some to M.E and some for my clique but not all of them eat it. Rozana, I'll buy for you some after your fasting finish. Hey bestie!, you promise to go clubbing with me after your o's, ya I'm looking forward to the day. I hope to spend more time with you. M.E, it's was kind of very insulting when you say you want to pay me for the doughnut, when I gave them to you with my sincerity but I don't mind you giving me money for the doughnut. Going for hair treatment tomorrow with Debra,Manyan and Rozana. I'm excited to see my new hair. It won't be frizzy anymore. Yayy :] Hey honey, I wished to spend mor etime with you and I don't think I should be hiding a lot of things from you but some things are just hard to explain. But if one day, if you really knwew what I was keeping from you, I hope you won't mind for what I am and what I'm not.



I'm going bankrupt!!! I spent over $2000 last month and I think I should stop saving man. Wah I guessed today must be a bad day for Debra. She got told off from Mrs Gomezzzz. I wonder why she kept picking on my clique! So irritating la. Anyway what she said abt debra today in class was insulting but I guess debra is optimistic but I hope what Mrs Gomez said about you are not true yeah.

FREEDOM SCRIBBLING!


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